Who Am I If Nobody is Looking?
ALIEN enters, a broad grin on their face, looking very cheery.
ALIEN: Hello there, fellow human! I too, am a human, as you can see, (gestures broadly at their body) by observing me. I even sound like a human… Well, (pinches fingers and squints an eye) very, very close. (Arrogant expression, nose raised, voice boasting) I have mastered this new variation of phonetics with ease, utilising a mimicry of the human mouth and throat, and even creating space for a respiratory system through an excruciating process where- (Pause, coy smile) well, you don’t want to know about that. Yes, to any old human I appear to be one of them. (Fade to a soft smile, shoulders relaxed) But with you, I feel I can be honest. Such a trusty, compact recording device, far less rudimentary than these (air-quotes) ‘devices’ the humans carry around. It is unlikely that these recordings will ever be seen by anyone other than me; but, if not, err… (Awkward pause before big smile.) Hello! That is the most typical greeting of the human language English. (Slight pause, thinking.) Although, within the age group I hope to portray, they have this… (They frown) strange written dialect of English that I am still learning, with (emphasis) much help from my human friends. It’s a ‘mishmash’ of strange short-hands, entirely new words, and sometimes even crude depictions of human features. (They shift to an excited smile.) The way this dialect has evolved is entirely fascinating, and my friends are constantly exposing me to new sources of media which reflect the creation, change and continuity of this language form. (Broad smile) Yes, they really are my friends… (Frown) But this ache for human connection is something I did not anticipate. There is truly no substitute for the strange way humans interact and connect… Without these emotions, fabricating new text in their languages would be impossible, (excited again) as human context changes the way we have ever understood writing! (Pause, another frown) I worry though… what would they think of me if they saw this, knew who I really was? Would they be afraid? Would they see me as lesser than or (small laugh) even greater than themselves? Our technological advancements and understandings of what the humans call ‘science’ and ‘mathematics’ may be far superior, but (eyebrows raised, incredulous) the social intelligence of even the most reserved human being is incomparable. (Pause, sigh.) For now, they need not know, and the only way to predict their reactions to such an (looking away, ashamed) enormous mistake on my part is (looking back, shrugging) to simply continue my studies. And hope, that one day (smile) I can be honest with them.p;